What are some questions to ask about a book?

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Books are perfect conversation starters. What and how often people read can tell a lot about their personality.

Yet, for some reason talking about books isn’t a conventional way to initiate small talk.

We’re so used to asking the standard “What do you do for a living?” and “How old are you” questions that we almost forgot how deeply, unique questions could open up people.

By asking about books and reading, you can enter a new dimension of interaction.

If you want book lovers to be genuinely interested in you, or you just simply crave to have a pleasant conversation, go ahead and ask these questions.

While it might be tempting to kickstart any conversation with book questions, don’t forget about some warm-up. As much as I’d love to go straight to a person and ask whether they enjoyed reading books as a kid, this step might seem awkward.

I suggest you ask first whether they’re enjoying the party, meeting, or whatever occasion you’re at, introduce yourself, and so on.

Enter the fascinating topic of books only after the initial sparkle arose.

Instead of the usual “What’s your favorite book” question, ask about the impact of that book.

People can answer the ‘favorite book’ question with a one-word answer, but if you ask for the impact of that book and the reason behind the impact, people will have way more to tell.

I want to know what kind of impact books had on people’s life because it’s so damn fascinating. I realized I could heal my childhood traumas as a direct result of reading a book. How stunning that is! Thank you, Tara Westover, for writing Educated. I’ll forever be grateful.

2. What book would you recommend to a friend?

With this question, you’ll get to know what kind of friends the person you’re talking to has. And also what problems those people are dealing with.

You might also get to know about how empathetic your conversation partner is if you also ask the “why” question afterward. You can get to know the intentions of that person.

At the same time, you can also think of it. What book would you recommend to one of your friends, and why exactly that book? Is it supposed to help them? To entertain them? Maybe open their eyes?

3. When did you realize reading is good for you?

I’ve started reading when I was 6 years old. My mom has always been reading aloud since I was a child, and the moment I could read myself, she gave me my first book. It was a Geronimo Stilton book if you’re interested.

Yet, I know many people who weren’t encouraged by their parents to read. Our school system was an even worse influence. As children, we were forced to read books we didn’t want and didn’t care about. I still know many people who, despite all, realized later on how valuable reading can be.

I’m fascinated by those who have never been set an example to read and still chose to give reading a chance.

4. Why are you reading?

Some people read to learn. For others, it’s mere entertainment. I’m a little bit both.

Some people solely want to seem more clever by binge-reading books and adding them to their ‘have read’ list.

Students read for their studies, heartbroken people read to erase the pain, and others fall in love. Maybe they want to fall in love with life. Or perhaps, they crave to fall in love again.

I have an itching feeling to get to know why a person is reading. It’s so damn fascinating.

5. What book should your mother read?

Maybe a little too personal question. Don’t force answering it; this might be painful for some who experienced trauma related to their moms, for example.

Yet, if your conversation partner answers this question, a new dimension of connection might arise between you two.

For others, this question isn’t painful at all but heartwarming.

6. How has reading changed your life?

Reading has shaped my life ever since I was a child. It gave me access to the brains of the most clever people who’ve ever lived on this planet. Reading was my escape to a fantasy world when life got hard, and sometimes, reading was my best friend.

I don’t know about you, but I’m curious what others experienced.

Are they happier because of reading? Do they feel more informed? Do they have the feeling that they know a little more about our complex world and the history that has shaped us?

7. What was the book you read in the least amount of time?

I’ve read Harry Potter in one sit when I was around nine years old. That book kept me wide awake until dawn, and I couldn’t help but binge-read it.

When the story is so exciting that it doesn’t let people sleep at night, I want to know about that book. I want to read those books and share the message with my friends.

We need more stories that keep us up in the night. Those stories are worth living for.

8. What was the book you read the longest?

Similarly, if someone has spent a lot of time reading a book, it might not be the best recommendation. That book might be dull. However, it might also indicate that the person who read it had some troubles and didn’t have the mental energy to read a complex book.

No matter which one is the case, both are great topics for an unconventional deep conversation.

9. What was the book you hated?

With this question, you likely go back to the long-forgotten world of compulsory literature at school. I hated almost every book we had to read. They were boring and sometimes poorly written, outdated books. I still don’t understand why we had to read the “big names of the nation” when there are so many great writers in the world.

Instead, we were forced to read some no-name Hungarian wannabes. It was dull.

I’m wondering whether people out there had similar experiences. Or did they encounter some books they hate later on?

10. Your favorite fiction book? And non-fiction?

While I believe the “what’s your favorite book” question is basic, you can twist it by breaking it down into fiction versus non-fiction.

I enjoy reading both categories and have my favorites in both. I know no one asked, but my favorite non-fiction is 21 Lessons for the 21st century by Yuval Noah Harari — big recommendation. And my favorite fiction is Master and Margarita by Bulgakov — trippy and political at the same time. It’s an absolute masterpiece. Pun intended.

11. Do you enjoy reading or Netflix more?

The answer to this question will tell a lot about the attention span of the person you’re talking to. Do they need constant action, vibrating colors on the screen, or can they imagine a fantasy world for themselves?

Reading is literally staring at a dead tree and hallucinating, and I would never exchange that for Netflix. But how do other people think about this?

+1. What’s the book you think everybody should read?

Lastly, I’d be curious which book people would recommend to everybody.

What’s that message, philosophy, social issue, or fictional story that everybody should know about. I genuinely want to know.

The book and reading questions are different. With them, you can get to know people through a unique lens: through the minds of the greatest writers of humanity.

So don’t hesitate, next time you meet up with people, initiate a conversation about books.

Books have shaped all of us more than we’re aware of it.

“One must always be careful of books, and what is inside them, for words have the power to change us.” ― Cassandra Clare, Clockwork Angel